the middle of the end

me and one of my Kindermusik kiddos, on our last day of class

Most of the important decisions we make in life are followed by a waiting period before the change truly takes effect. Nine months for a baby; an engagement to get married, months of shopping before buying a house. We knew we were moving to Vancouver in February; now it’s the end of June, and we still have two months before our move.

My emotions have run the gamut during these months. I’ve been anxious to start our life there, and not ready to leave our life here at the same time.  For a long time now, Vancouver has seemed like an imaginary place that we’ll only visit in our dreams. It’s all we talk about, yet nothing is happening yet. It’s the kid-waiting-for-Christmas phenomenon– at least that’s how I feel.

And yet all this time has been necessary. Logistically, we’ve needed time to research and prepare. The next few weeks will be busy as we actually begin the paperwork, apartment hunting and moving process. Mentally, I’ve needed time to wrap my head around the leaving aspect of this choice. The part I’ve hated the most, though, is all the goodbyes I’ve had to say in the past few weeks. Finishing all my teaching jobs and saying goodbye to people I’ve developed connections with, but won’t be in my life from here on, has made my heart ache.

Today, I finish this process of saying goodbye. Anyone from now on who I say “goodbye” to, it’s really “see you later”. Friends and family will be in my life still, I’m confident of this. Friendships may change, but this is a part of life and I’m excited to see what comes out of it. So finally, I see some light at the end of this Vancouver-shaped tunnel. Now, to find the strength to make it to September…

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Chrissie
    Jun 28, 2010 @ 16:37:59

    Praying for you guys in this time of waiting and anticipation. Hoping that God blesses you with dreams and vision to excite you even more for the move and for your life in Vancouver. And yes, we’ll miss you muchly but we’ll visit!

    Reply

  2. Patti
    Jun 28, 2010 @ 18:01:17

    Learning how to say good bye is a skill many of us never get a handle on because it is so darn hard. Leaving “home” is huge,a major transition. I have found under estimating the impact of transitions just make them harder. To love fully means to feel fully and stay in the present moment with all the emotions that come. This is a hard, but yet very special time for you and Nate. I am always taken by your wisdom. I know you and Nate are loved and will be missed, and yet a whole new chapter of your lives is about to be written.What a sacred time you two are in right now, waiting, saying good bye and anticipating. All are important. If I have on my “mommy hat” I apologize. Your writing just really struck me this morning and I wanted to respond.
    Love you two!

    Reply

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